Family: roles, structures, functions and gender issues
Family success is the measure of a successful life for the Filipinos.
(Pondoyo, G. 2011)
Filipinos are raised to demonstrate respect towards their elders; from the moment a child is able to understand, it is essential that they learn to say “po” (sir) and “opo” (yes) when speaking with their elders. This knowledge of respect is not only expected from children, but from adults as well. As a person from the Philippines, it is necessary to always use these words when conversing with those that are older (www.philippinecountry.com: common family traits).
Within the family, children are expected to exude proper treatment towards their parents and older siblings. In the Filipino family dynamic, the eldest children are given much more responsibility: looking after their siblings when their parents are not around, for example. Intolerable behaviours include fighting with parents and/or older siblings as well as speaking with an arrogant tone. Children who act out this high level of inappropriateness would be reprimanded. Furthermore, a child living in a Filipino household is required to ask permission before leaving the home. Once the child has returned, their parents and elder family members anticipate “the kissing of hands” or a “hand-to-forehead” gesture with the words “mano po” which symbolizes an appropriate greeting. (www.philippinecountry.com: common family traits).
Unlike the “norm” in Canada where it is expected that a child “leave the nest” at the age of eighteen, Filipino children are not obligated to leave home once they have graduated-unless that is what they choose. Due to the valued closeness between family members and the respect that they feel for their parents, most children do not start a life of their own until they are about to be wed. For this reason it is not uncommon to see several generations living under the same roof. “As Filipinos say, ‘not being able to know a relative is like turning their backs from where they come from’” (www.philippinecountry.com: common family traits).
Within the family, children are expected to exude proper treatment towards their parents and older siblings. In the Filipino family dynamic, the eldest children are given much more responsibility: looking after their siblings when their parents are not around, for example. Intolerable behaviours include fighting with parents and/or older siblings as well as speaking with an arrogant tone. Children who act out this high level of inappropriateness would be reprimanded. Furthermore, a child living in a Filipino household is required to ask permission before leaving the home. Once the child has returned, their parents and elder family members anticipate “the kissing of hands” or a “hand-to-forehead” gesture with the words “mano po” which symbolizes an appropriate greeting. (www.philippinecountry.com: common family traits).
Unlike the “norm” in Canada where it is expected that a child “leave the nest” at the age of eighteen, Filipino children are not obligated to leave home once they have graduated-unless that is what they choose. Due to the valued closeness between family members and the respect that they feel for their parents, most children do not start a life of their own until they are about to be wed. For this reason it is not uncommon to see several generations living under the same roof. “As Filipinos say, ‘not being able to know a relative is like turning their backs from where they come from’” (www.philippinecountry.com: common family traits).
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Filipino Quotes on Family
Boholanos: “Ang familia nga nagatanum ug kaayohan nag-ani ug kapalaran; ang nagatanum ugkadautan, nag-ani og lonlon kasakitan” Meaning: “The family that sows goodness reaps fortune; the one that sows evil reaps suffering” *This statement suggests karma in that every action will cause either a positive or negative reaction. (Pondoyo, G. 2011) Bicolanos: “An harong man palasyo kun an laog kuwago, marhay pa ang payag na laog tao” Meaning: A house may be a palace, but if the owner is an owl, better is a hut where the owner is a human being. *This statement is a powerful reflection of the way that Filipinos value family over economic influences. (Pondoyo, G. 2011) |
The commercial above demonstrates the respect and kindness that Filipinos share with one another, and is a good example of their quote: "The family that sows goodness reaps fortune; the one that sows evil reaps suffering”.
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A husband and wife are otherwise known as having a “mag-asawa”
status. It is not until the man and
woman have a child that they are blessed
with “mag-anak” status. This stresses
the significance on the value of children in the Filipino culture, as a couple
is not considered a family until a child is born. In the Philippines, the more children that a
husband produces may lead others to think that he is more masculine than those
who have fewer offspring. On the other
hand, a woman may be viewed as though she is finally living up to her potential
as a woman, while taking comfort in the thought that a newborn has secured her relationship
with her husband (Pondoyo, G. 2011).
The Modern Filipino Family: A changing world leads to changing family dynamic. Parents who leave home to find work abroad must leave their children in the hands of other relatives, causing a shift in authority resulting in differences to how the child interacts with the world around them.
Although aspects within the Filipino culture are beginning to shift, there is still little equality between men and women. Woman face certain burdens within the labor market that men do not, such as unpaid domestic work and care. Access to financial services along with other similar resources are limited to females living in the Philippines, as well as a lack of training programs and inadequate education (Layton, R., MacPhail, F. 2013).
My brief interview with K. Espejo, who was born and raised in Canada and is married to a man from the Philippines.
Q: “Are men and women treated as equals in the Philippines?”
A: “I wouldn’t say equals, no. Men tend to be the more ‘favored’ gender in the Philippines. For example: if I were growing up in a family where I had a brother, he would likely receive more toys, praise etc.
Q: “Do both men and woman work?”
A: “Times are certainly changing, but I believe men remain the provider while it is the woman’s duty to tend to the home and the children.”
The Modern Filipino Family: A changing world leads to changing family dynamic. Parents who leave home to find work abroad must leave their children in the hands of other relatives, causing a shift in authority resulting in differences to how the child interacts with the world around them.
Although aspects within the Filipino culture are beginning to shift, there is still little equality between men and women. Woman face certain burdens within the labor market that men do not, such as unpaid domestic work and care. Access to financial services along with other similar resources are limited to females living in the Philippines, as well as a lack of training programs and inadequate education (Layton, R., MacPhail, F. 2013).
My brief interview with K. Espejo, who was born and raised in Canada and is married to a man from the Philippines.
Q: “Are men and women treated as equals in the Philippines?”
A: “I wouldn’t say equals, no. Men tend to be the more ‘favored’ gender in the Philippines. For example: if I were growing up in a family where I had a brother, he would likely receive more toys, praise etc.
Q: “Do both men and woman work?”
A: “Times are certainly changing, but I believe men remain the provider while it is the woman’s duty to tend to the home and the children.”
